Why?

Why is that hard to have a chance from you? I hope you can give me a chance but i know that will not happen so i am not happy...i am not saying that you are wrong...the person that is wrong is me...i have to tell myself everyday "she is a friend, she is a friend". I have to tell myself like this so that i can fool myself...but to be honest, it has no use on me...i everyday go college have 2 intentions,

1. Study
2. Just to have a look at her

you might think that i am stupid or crazy, but i am not, i just want to know is she happy or not...that's all...if she is unhappy i also can't do anything but at least can sms her and ask what happen...she won't reply me but i also can do nothing more...that is what i can do only...

i know i am old and she is young...i am not cheating a small girl...i am true to her, haiz...who will know?no one. i don't care if anyone believe me or not...i only hope she will believe me...i hope so much also no use because she will never know...